be a mother and homemaker and an environmental expert in designing a
place for the particular blend of people which will be your family—to
grow and develop—is an amazing possibility. To be at the same time a
wife and a companion, an interesting, growing, changing, developing
person in the eyes of the man you married—not for just two years nor
twelve nor twenty nor thirty, but forty and fifty years—is an added
portion of this career." ~Edith Schaeffer
Right now I'd say that my foremost wish (besides wanting to glorify God in all that I do) is to get married. Yeah, that little-girl-dream all girls have. Not because I want to escape the evil clutches of a tyrannical life at home, not because I want my woman's independence, not because I dislike being a daughter at home, but because I want to have a husband to have and to hold, to love and to cherish, to do his laundry, clean his house, make his meals, cook him scrumptious desserts, run to him and jump into his arms every day when he gets home from work, read a good book with him in bed, sneak chocolate and ice cream under the covers and giggle like secretive ten-year-olds, go walking in the park while holding hands and maybe even stop at the swing set, fall asleep on his shoulder under the stars on our front porch and have him carry me to bed, have him look deeply in my eyes and tell me how much he adores me as he whispers of my beauty (big imagination here), go on adventurous, romantic escapades, have our own candlelight dinners at home, give birth to his children, and on and on my simple list goes.
Okay. I admit I have too many stars in my eyes.
Guess I forget to mention the countless times he will track muddy boots into the just-sparkling-clean house, the disagreements and arguments (hopefully those will be few and far in-between!), the time he will go to pick me up and drops me of all things (slow down on the chocolate, Rachel!), his grumpy mood after a long and tedious day at work, the nights he doesn't want to snuggle but goes right to sleep (bummer), the food I scorch, the times he is late coming home, my irritable moods, my impatience with the children when they are being too noisy in their play, the squalling baby who keeps me up every hour of the night, the day the washing and drying machine breaks down, the time I eat onions and he doesn't want to kiss me ("what's up with that, Honey?!"), the tears of frustration, the times when nothing in the house seems to stay clean, and on and on this list can go.
It's a crazy world. One moment we are living on the high of new love, and the next we are back to reality. No worries. That doesn't damper my desire to get married. The good definitely far outweighs the bad. Sometimes the cost is great, but the reward is just so much greater!
But because my aspiration to get married is greatly elevated, discontentment tends to seep into my life in paramount abundance. Especially the older I grow. God, my longing is too much to bear! Marry me off soon...please?
Oh yes, I absolutely want to get married (and God, as a side note, soon...ahem...whenever You think best would be preferable!), but many times I approach my desire for marriage with the wrong attitude. I'm telling God I know better concerning when I should get married, instead of submitting to His will. Marriage is viewed with my two hungry eyes, regarding it as some earthly heavenly state more privileged than the one I'm in. Not so.
Of course, as many married women can attest I'm sure, there is nothing compared to living with the love of your life, taking care of him, and all the benefits of marriage, but we unmarried gals still have a lot to learn that they already know. Those married women already know that marriage isn't a bed of roses every day, every minute of the day (as wonderful as a bed of roses sounds). There are problems to deal with, just as there are problems to deal with before we get married.
Oh well. Life is life. Life always have problems. I for one am willing to take the problems with my dreams. Dreams do come true, if you can recall Cinderella's story from back when you were five. Maybe not in the fanciful fairytale Hollywood version of love, but dreams can become reality. I know my dream to get married will come true one day, but in God's timing. I simply have to trust Him with that epoch in my life. I can feel the bliss just thinking about it...
If you think about it, dreams really do come true—the right kind of dreams that is. Our dreams, hopes, desires, and expectations for the future must become God's desires (Psalm 37:4-5). Only then will they come to pass. We must give up ourselves completely to the will of God. But guess what? We will have a much more wonderful life because of it! He will give us the desires of our hearts, because we will desire what God has in store for us—what He deems best.
When dreams come true. It sounds like a fairytale. Life is a fairytale of sorts sometimes, mixed with a heavy dose of realism and life (i.e. sin, fallen man, and the chore of daily living). After all, life can't be all bliss and pleasure; life always has thorns with its roses. Nevertheless, God is working all things for our good (Romans 8:28), and we should always remember that God's good is much better than our best.
So I'll keep dreaming. While living in the here and now. One day my dreams will come true and I'll get to wear a fancy white dress and a veil with flowers in my hair and walk down the aisle on Daddy's arm to the man of my dreams who will be waiting at the alter.