The Depravity of the Tongue

"Lord, make me a channel of Thy peace

That where there is hatred, I may bring love,

That where there is wrong, I may bring the spirit of forgiveness,

That where there is discord, I may bring harmony,

That where there is error, I may bring truth,

That where there is doubt, I may bring faith,

That where there is despair, I may bring hope,

That where there are shadows, I may bring light,

That where there is sadness, I may bring joy."

-St. Francis of Assisi

 

 

Let me begin with a story.

Once upon a time, in the schoolroom of an ordinary little home, there lived eight children: Temper, Impatience, Bossy, Anger, Hateful, Jealousy, Pride, and Conflict.  Unlike the happily ever after stories of fairytale books, these little children loved to quarrel and fight and argue and bicker amongst themselves.  Their names, as you can see, befit their character perfectly.  These eight children were constantly at war with one another—sometimes two against one, or seven ganging up against one, or five against two—and it seemed quite a hopeless case of self-love: each esteeming self above all the others.  What a horrible way to begin a story, aye?

 

You can read the rest of the post here where I was hosted on the lovely blog, Not An Average Girl.  Go and check it out, and enjoy!

A Conversation-Monopolizing Bore

Or, How to [not] Become a Fanatical Conversationalist

The Story of a Cowardly Conversationalist

I laugh at myself when I think about this subject topic.  I am not a good conversationalist, and I never have been.  I always like to say that my speaking ability lies in the power of my pen.  I used to think that I would rather write a letter to a friend or family member so that I could say exactly what I wanted to say, than to speak to them in person as I trip over words and barely cover a third of what I wanted to say in the first place.  It’s a terrible weakness really.  I ought to push myself and exceed the minimal limits that I have placed upon myself, but I don’t know if I am that brave yet (although reading Stonewall Jackson’s Book of Maxims is greatly encouraging me).  However, I can say that I have come a long way since I was thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, and maybe even sixteen.  I feel a little bit more confident than I did then, but still not confident enough.  Self-confidence is just not my forte.

Between my fifteenth and sixteenth year I found out how much I exceedingly enjoyed to write (that is also when I really began to write poetry on a constant basis, and consequently I now have around 120 poems).  From some of my early years as a young girl I can still remember how much I loved to read, and even write short stories and poems, but it really kicked in as I grew older.  Although, there is one thing that I regret about my avid reading and writing: because I found a weak spot in my conversational skills, I retreated back into myself so that I would not have to face as much embarrassment.  Now I find out what a bad mistake that was.  Sometimes I think I’m going insane because I have all sorts of conversations—profound ones and trivial ones—with myself in my head because of my conversational cowardice.  I could give you an example to corroborate my story, but I don’t want my head psychoanalyzed.

I prefer the usage of majestic gargantuan words when I write.  You cannot conjecture the arduous quantity of time I exhaust exploring the reference publication listing of alphabetically arranged definitions for dexterous and zestful phrases and expressions to exhibit my cosmopolitan yearning of sophistication.   Okay, perhaps that last sentence was a bit ambiguous.  I definitely cannot do that in my regular everyday speech (my siblings would think I had lost it).  On the other hand, I think I tend to be more extreme when it comes to the words I use in writing because I would rather find the biggest and most delicious words in the dictionary to get my point across and not everybody know what I mean, than to use everyday proper language that I know people will understand.  I am not a big word type of person in my conversation though, no matter my aspirations to be one.  My writing is a different story, as you can see. 

So what exactly is a conversation-monopolizing bore?  Someone who dominates the tête-à-tête so that the other person can’t even get a word in edgewise?  I’d say that pretty much sums it up, including someone who is so lax in their conversation skills that the lagging conversation is downright b-o-r-i-n-g (guilty).  I know best what it is not, mostly because I am not the kind to greatly monopolize conversations...with strangers and friends anyway.  Then again, I, well, I’m afraid that I can be a wee bit overbearing with my siblings...oops.  But for the most part, I am apt to shy away into the background as a very backward, reserved, quiet little girl (I said for the most part).

I once heard the word cosmopolitan in a story a few years back and loved it.  Just say it aloud and you will know what I mean: cos-mo-pol-i-tan.  I love the sound of it!  Then I proceeded to look up its meaning because I had never heard the word before.  I found that it basically meant “from or knowing many parts of the world; sophisticated.”  Definitely me, in a wishful kind of sense.  Not that I am cultured or refined or traveled.  I used to hope that a dashing Christian millionaire would fall for me and we would travel the world (thus earning the cosmopolitan title), but now I think I was deceiving myself (Gal.6:3).  Besides, I don’t even know any dashing Christian millionaires, specifically who fit my ideal!  Okay, I’m getting a little off course here.

“Wherefore, my beloved brethren,
let every man be swift to hear,
slow to speak, slow to wrath.”
-James 1:19

Real meaningful conversation that doesn’t lag and isn’t boring consists of two parts: speaking and listening.  Awkward conversation is lopsided when one person does most of the talking, or when two people twiddle their thumbs not knowing what to say, but real conversation is what we want.  In real conversation (and when I say real I mean meaningful) there are two people communicating responsibly and maturely, both equally listening to what the other person has to say, and both equally participating in the talking aspect.

I am sure we all know that the most important person in conversation is the other person.  The way we can show this is by keeping eye contact, for as my dad says, this shows the other person that we are genuinely interested in what they have to say, and that we respect them enough to actually listen to them.  Most times we are too engrossed by what we want to say (our “wisdom,” or perhaps a favorite topic we are passionate about) that we often forget about the other person as we rattle off nonsense or even a legitimate subject matter.  What we don’t realize is that we damage relationships when we control conversation.  Plus, people then decide we are boring and don’t want to engage us in conversation again.   Look out—Rachel is coming—hide!

“Let the words of my mouth,
and the meditation of my heart,
be acceptable in Thy sight, O LORD,
my strength and my redeemer.”
-Psalm 19:14

While being a good listener is absolutely vital, the words that we speak are also just as important, for they reflect upon our characteristics and nature in general.  If all we do is prattle off whatever comes to our brain, we will likely be proven a fool.  Then again, if we use the hip and trendy language of the modern youth that really doesn’t make any sense (yaknow, like using, yaknow, like, words that, like, make no sense whatever man), we will still look (and sound) a fool.  The only way to exercise proper verbal communication is to think about what we are going to say before we say it.  This also eliminates any hurtful words that might pop out.  We are accountable to the Lord for everything we do, including the words of our mouth (Matt.12:36).  The easiest way to make a fool of oneself is to insert-foot-into-mouth.  How ever we do it, I can’t even comprehend, but we do it nevertheless.  Even reserved people such as myself.  But I have found out that the more jovial, open, and talkative one is, the easier it is to insert foot.  No offense, jovial, open, and talkative people.

I have always envied those who always know what to say, whether it be something witty and humorous, or a philosophical intelligent reply.  I am never anything of the kind.  I’m more the type who will think of that certain witty or intelligent remark hours later while lying in bed unable to sleep.  I’ll jerk straight up as if a lightning bold hit me: “Aha! I know just what too say!”  But by then it is far too late.  I’m afraid my intelligence comes none too quick.  Bummer.

Fortunately for me I don’t tend to monopolize conversations.  No, I’m more inclined to be just plain reserved and boring.  How humdrum.  On the contrary, I can remember being eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, sixteen even and terrible indecisive on what to say to a friend.  I remember one specific friend with whom I would sit on the couch at my grandparents’ house and barely say five words to when I was eleven.  How she ever put up with backward little me, I’ll never know.  The good news is that I have changed a little bit—not so shy, not so backward, not such a non-conversationalist, not such a freak—but I still don’t monopolize conversations. 

Who knows, I may get there yet.  But I doubt it.

Must I Continue?

Selfishness, self-love, self-righteousness, jealousy, strife, conflict, rivalry, competition, resentment, anger, hurtful teasing, harassment, intolerance of fault in others, quarreling, backbiting, impatience, self-pride, degradation of others, sarcasm, disunity, obstinacy, narcissism, autonomy, selfish ambition, bitterness, grudges, hatred, discontentment, cruel remarks, rebellion, temper outbursts, rudeness...

Must I continue?

There are many reason why I have decided to write this book, the first and foremost being for the glory of God and the advancement of His kingdom.  Secondly, I write this book for my seven siblings (nope, seven isn't lucky for me because I still have to deal with the same problems that everyone else has to deal with).  They are a rather lively and unique group of kids, with many different talents and personalities and characteristics and gifts.  Grace (16), Kirstie (14), Katie (12), Maggie (11), Reb (9), Clara (7), and Liberty (2) are all very intelligent and clever, but you know me: highly prejudiced when it comes to my family.  I will defend them to the death...even if we aren't exactly getting along very well at the moment.  I want to give them an inheritance from their oldest sister, a legacy of love that can be passed down to offer guidance, edification, and sanctification amidst a crooked and perverse generation (Phil.2:5).  I want them to know what it means to struggle, yet overcome those struggles and move on toward success.  This is my prayer.

I also write this book for my children in the future.  Being a kid once myself [humor inserted], I know what it's like to go through sibling rivalry, and I don't want my children wasting years of their lives as bitter enemies with their [many] brothers and sisters.  I want this book to be a part of the heritage that I pass on to my children in future years as a part of their mother's love to them.  I'm trying to keep a multigenerational viewpoint in mind as I write as a vision of hope for my children.

This book is furthermore for other struggling siblings.  I know that my siblings and I are not the only ones who struggle, for rivalry is a common problem.  Why?  Well, you'll just have to wait and read my book.

Must I continue?

My heart beats with intense delight.  I do not know how long or when, but I do know, and I can't tell you how joyous that makes me feel.  It will be a dream come true when I am finally able to hold a freshly-printed copy of my book in my hands.  Then I will read it all the way through and count how many mistakes I made.  Oh dear...

Maybe I won't.  It may be too much of a painful project.  Then you can read it all the way through and tell me how many mistakes I made.

As I continue on my journey, my quest-like answering-all-of-the-problems (well, not really; I don't have all of the answers), I have to remember that it is not all my siblings' fault that we don't get along as best friends.  Ultimately, I am to blame.  We each individually are to blame.  If we are the oldest then we have an even greater responsibility, but no matter our sibling station—whether we are the oldest, the youngest, or one in between—we are to be accountable for our actions.  We can't simply throw all the blame on our siblings' shoulders and get away with it, because that proves our selfishness, self-love, and immaturity.  Do we really love ourselves so much that we can't admit when we are wrong?

I don't want to dishearten you, I want to encourage you!  I have seen examples of siblings who rose above the standard "just get along and don't kill each other" mentality, and become the best of best friends.  As a matter of fact, they become best friends forever.  Those stories stimulate me.  I want my relationship with my siblings to become just like that, and then in turn, encourage others so that they want the same outcome.

You can be an incredible help to me, with your prayers, your encouragement, and even your input.  Everyone has questions that they want answered, and while I am not the best qualified, I know the best place to look (John 5:39)—a place that we all can access, thanks to the blood and sweat of martyrs and Church fathers.

Any daughter at home has great potential to advance the kingdom of Christ.  I want to use the rest of my unmarried years to the fullest extent possible, doing everything I can to further my father's vision, be a help to my mother, and become the best friend of my siblings.  Surprisingly, I think that I have lost my vehement desire to get married as soon as possible.  Like I have any control over that anyway.  I won't kid you, I still want to get married...someday, believe me.  But right now I have an obligation to fulfill, and it cannot be fulfilled unless I focus on it completely, without the interruption of sighs, longings, and dreams that distract and hinder me.  Dreams I will keep dreaming, but for now I am excited about being a daughter and a siblings.  With the glasses that I wear, the grass looks greener here than it does on the other side.

I don't think I need continue.

With summer almost gone and school almost beginning, my days will be very busy.  Plus finishing pocket college, I'll be doing more work for Daddy, HTML, lots of reading, and working with my younger-schooled siblings.  I won't officially graduate so to speak until this school year ends so that we can do things right for the formal proclamation, but I'm thankful for one more chance to study hard and learn all that I can.  One more year, then I will no longer be a schoolgirl.  I wonder how that will feel...

A Big Idea

What does one have to do to achieve a big idea, perhaps a long-awaited dream that can almost—almost—be tasted?  It is hard work, lots of prayer, and a resolution to be whatever you want to be (Stonewall Jackson).

So I have resolved.

Once I resolve I don't give up.  Even if it means a very long period of time.  Weeks. Months. Even years.  But I don't think it will be that long.

Due to a recent thrust from my supportive parents, I have begun another journey.  This one also entails tears, hard work, lots of prayer, support, encouragement, but is in fact a different category.

It entails days upon days of writing.  Experience.  Questions.  Answers.  Searching.  Siblings.  Scripture.  Stacks of books.  A cluttered desk.  Throbbing temples.  Aching hand.  Weary eyes.  Hopeful heart.  Excited dreams.  Prayer and Thanksgiving.

But for what?

I have been greatly disturbed and saddened by an overwhelming amount of brothers and sisters who do not get along...Quite frankly, there just isn't enough material out there in the Christian, and more particularly, the Reformed worldview...That is why, with lots of prayer and support from my family, I begin this project: the quest for a happy, peaceful, flourishing, harmonizing, free-from-antagonism-but-not-completely-perfect home...more specifically, sibling friendship.

"I heard the voice of the Lord, saying, Whom shall I send, and who will go for us? Then said I, Here am I; send me." -Isaiah 6:8

There is plenty of fiction out in the world—most of it being junk—but I, as a Reformed young woman wanting to advance the kingdom of Christ and glorify Him in everything I do (man's chief end), realize that there is more to life than fantasy and make-believe.  Something more important.  What about "real life"?  What about the problems we face, particularly in our crumbling homes and families?  What about leaving a legacy to my seven siblings, my own children, and other families in the years to come?  Will I not want to leave behind me a vision for future generations?  What about the generation here and now?  Everyone wants their life to count for something, to have a purpose to everything they do.  For the Christian this means to glorify God (1 Cor.10:31) and bring every thought captive to His Word (2 Cor.10:3-5).

 My writing desk

Even writing a book.

Surely I've given enough hints for you to know what my big idea is by now...

Living The Impossible

2010 has closed its door; 2011 has opened another.  This means God has not forsaken us, but has given us another chance at life, and another chance to live wholly for His glory.  Let's look at "living for God's glory" a moment.  1 Corinthians 10:31 says, "Whether therefore ye eat, or drink, or whatsoever ye do, do all to the glory of God." We may smile and nod our heads in righteous piety, but do we take this verse at its fullest context?  "I pray before I eat," we may say triumphantly.  Apparently we forgot to read the remainder of the verse.  You've heard that the Bible applies to every area of life?  This verse could sum it up.  Man's chief end is to glorify God and to enjoy Him forever, exactly what this verse is reminding us.   "Whatsoever ye do" doesn't mean whatever we feel like doing or whatever we want to do - it is everything.  That means how we treat our siblings, honor our parents, the music we listen to, the movies we watch, the books we read, the words we say, our attitudes, our thoughts, even the simplest chores around the house.  We want to do something big, however.  Some of us may be willing to face the jungles of Africa or the communist hostility in China, but no one wants to wield a toilet scrubber and face a dirty bathroom.  Or, we may want to work in a big company for fame, recognition, money, or even just to make a difference, but who wants to help their father in his vision and business, especially if it is small and unnoticed?  We would gloriously die on the mission field, but we don't want to live contentedly at home. We take Paul's words in Philippians 1:21 a little too far.  Sure, to die is gain for Christ.

Daughters at home can get a little discouraged sometimes.  Okay, maybe very discouraged (more than sometimes).  This is dangerous- very dangerous - because the world begins to look inviting.  We must not fall into that trap!  Daily routine becomes monotonous. Because of our restlessness and discontentment, we are grumpy, moody, and liable to be snappish.  The truth of the matter is that we are not happy with our position, and we don't want to glorify God in everything.

I'm not one for making New Year's resolutions.  I never have been.  Anything I might have "promised" myself in the past always ended in disaster, such as waking up every morning with a smile on my lips and a song in my heart.  It's always the impossible with me.  I might want to be completely loving, always honoring my parents, never quarreling [much] with my siblings, always having the right attitude in every situation, being a servant, daily displaying the Fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22,23), and on and on and on the list goes.  Call me crazy, but I'm a perfectionist.

Mark 10:27 and Luke 1:37; 18: 27 say the same thing: with God nothing is impossible.  So we think that, while glorifying God in the home, everything should be practically unproblematic.  We want the easy life.  Yet, if everything was easy and breezy, where would satisfaction come in?  Our character would never be strengthened, our patience would never be tried, and we would never receive a "well done" from our Master.  Life wouldn't be life without difficulty.  There would be no triumph over trials and no ultimate glory in the end.  We would be lazy good-for-nothings.

Again we take a verse out of context (many times we do this to fit our preferences, ironically).  We as infallible human beings cannot be perfect!   Everything is impossible with us because we cannot do good. (Romans 3:10; 3:23; 7:15; Isaiah 64:6)   Therefore we shouldn't expect a miracle every morning (especially at 7:00 a.m.).  However, this also doesn't mean we have the right to be a snappy grump.  Titus 2:3-5 exhorts women of all ages to be holy, temperate, loving, discreet, good, and obedient - showing us a pattern of good works.   I know from experience how hard it is to be kind and patient.  But that doesn't give us the license to be mean, cross, and irritable.  To develop a good relationship with family and friends we have to be considerate, helpful, understanding, and attentive.  If not, bitterness and strife will cause pain because of rejection.   Again, speaking from experience, people will want to completely ignore you if you haven't the right attitude.  Everyone finds irksome people a chore to get along with.  True love will find a way, however, even amongst faults. (1 Corinthians 13)

With a whole new year ahead of us, just waiting for us to taste the delicious delights pending over the horizon, we shouldn't expect the impossible.  Instead, cultivate joy and contentment even in the smallest of things.  People will be happier, and the atmosphere so much more pleasant.  Because God in His mercy and grace has given us another chance, we ought to look forward with bright eyes and a rapidly beating heart.  Only God knows what lies ahead, but we can be sure it will be something grand as long as we walk in His footsteps.

Living the impossible...
For the Crown Rights of Jesus Christ
Soli Deo Gloria!
For Christ's Crown and Covenant

Preacher's Kid

There is a lot of pressure on preacher’s kids.  (Face it—we're oddballs.)  We are supposed to act different, talk different, think different, watch different movies, listen to different music, wear different clothes, have different friends and families, read different books, and so on.  It all comes down to behavior.  Sometimes we may be referred to as weird.  On the other hand, if we don't live up to our expectations, we're scoffed at even more for not being a representative of Christ.  Suddenly, we're ironic.  Perhaps there isn't any truth to this Christian business after all.  Isn't that a truce broken in our Salt and Light mandate? (Matthew 5:13-16)

Being any kind of Christian in a humanistic world is hard.  I'm not talking about wishy-washy hypocritical Christians who proclaim good works in the streets and practice sin in their homes.  They may write a bestseller book with a big cheesy smile on the cover, but it doesn't mean they are right, honest, or Christ-like (Matthew 7:15, 21-23). Recognition by the secular world does not mean they accept Christianity.  In fact, Jesus said that we would be persecuted and reviled for His sake.  (Matthew 5:11; 10:22)  If the world didn't accept its Saviour when He came, why should it accept His disciples?

"Behold, I send you forth as sheep in the midst of wolves: be ye therefore wise as serpents, and harmless as doves."  ~Matthew 10:16

Yes, I'm a preacher's kid.  In addition, I am also a young woman living in a secular world.  I feel the pressure hitting me like a ton of bricks.  But I'm no different from y'all.  There's only one thing that makes me different from the world's young people.  Yep, you guessed it.  I'm a preacher's kid.

No, I'm not ashamed of my heritage.  My father is a pastor, my grandpa is a pastor, and one of my great-great-great-grandfathers was a pastor.  There are even more scattered throughout our ancestors.  The point is this: my life has been intertwined with God in the midst of it.  I'm a preacher's kid of a preacher's kid.  Where's the shame in that?  I'm proud of it.

The only thing I regret is my poor ability for handling certain situations.  I've stuck my foot in my mouth, I've stood back and followed the crowd, I've not been a leader, and I've spurted some pretty crazy ideas. (Just ask my mom.)  Right now I wish I had charged full ahead into my insecurities...but I didn't.  There have been many times I've wished to go back and redo my life.  Of course, we always wish for the impossible.

Although I may not be where I wish to be, I'd say I've come a long way in some areas.  Two years ago I never would have imagined this blog, my writing, our traipse through Georgia, the beginning of Covenant Baptist Church and Covenant Commission, the birth of Liberty (my baby sister), my 16th birthday (two years ago it seemed like forever), the crazy ups and downs of life...hey, even my photography!  Life is peculiar sometimes, isn't it? 

However, I could really better myself.  I may be swept up into the pressure of being a preacher's kid sometimes, but I don't have to be.  What I am can be a good thing.

Every aspect of this world has tribulation.  We may be hit with tragedy, trial, sorrow, or pain, but Christ foretold that these things would happen.

"These things I have spoken unto you, that in Me ye might have peace.  In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world."  ~John 16:33

 Isn't that comforting?

"What shall we then say to these things?  If God be for us, who can be against us?"  ~Romans 8:31

The world’s opinion should not matter to us.  Why should we care about the opinions of those who reject our Saviour and faith?

While we are to be God's witnesses for the gospel, the world just hardens their hearts against us.  From history, we can learn that tribulation worketh patience (Romans 5:3).  From the lives of the martyrs we see glory and fortitude and everlasting life.  They received their crown with the words "well done, thou good and faithful servant" for their service in the kingdom.  What is our persecution compared to theirs?  True, mental stress can be just as horrible as physical pain, but have we ever suffered starvation in a cold, damp dungeon, or felt the flames rise higher and higher around our legs?  Nor have we been tortured for Christ's sake in a country wholly hostile to Jesus.  Think again when all seems lost.  We live freely (for the most part anyway), breathe the clean air every day, walk wherever we please unconstrained, and worship God wherever we will.  How long our freedoms will last, God only knows.  For now we ought to be profoundly thankful that we live, and move, and have our being, for it is all through Jesus Christ. 
Anyway, Paul's words should give us comfort: 

"For I reckon that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us."  ~Romans 8:18  

That is saying a lot, considering all that Paul went through - beatings, a stoning, being left for dead, thrown into prison, and eventually beheaded—all for Christ's sake.  Surely we can bear our burdens easier when we really give it some thought.

So, I may be a preacher's kid with all its peculiar pressures, but I've found out that life is much better when I have a positive outlook.   Who cares if I'm a little bizarre?  I'm a preacher's kid, what do you expect?

"Now thanks be unto God, which always causeth us to triumph in Christ, and maketh manifest the savor of His knowledge by us in every place."  ~2Corinthians 2:14

There is nothing sweeter than Scripture for a troubled heart.  God really is good.  But He is also just.  He destroys the wicked and cannot tolerate sin, yet He is faithful to those who love Him.  His words to us are sweeter than honey. (Psalm 19:7-11)  I believe He would rather see a smile on our faces and joyfully praising Him than to have a "woe is me" mentality.

I'm sure preachers kids can relate.  It's awfully hard to live up to high expectations when our nature is sinful.  Sometimes we are given bad names because of what we are.  The bad names really come from preachers kids who don't fulfill their God-given duty.  I may fail many times, but I don't like being categorized in that lot.   Sometimes it seems like we have to endure more than we can handle.  However, Jesus said we will not be tempted with more than we are able.  Hallelujah! Through Christ, we will conquer over all!

"Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword?  As it is written, for Thy sake we are killed all the day long; we are accounted as sheep for the slaughter.  Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him that loved us.  For I am persuaded that neither heath, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature shall be able to separate s from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord."  ~Romans 8:35

The Importance of Womanhood

What woman understands the definition of courage?  Who has experienced real hardship?  When life is put to the test, when wealth is stripped away, and love seems forsaken, would we still rise to the height of our calling?

Womanhood is an essential important factor in life.  Although we are more frail and weak than men, the strength of our hearts can overcome even the greatest obstacle; then we are strong.

Such a caliber of womanhood is unheard of today.  In a society where women are men and men are women, we don't see motherly and wifely zeal.  Wives and mothers are no longer wives and mothers.  Instead, they are smokers, drunk drivers, and workmen all rolled into one.  They aren't submissive unto man, and especially not unto God.  Most women don't even know what femininity is.  Have godly feminine women ceased to exist?

To find such aforesaid women, we have to jump back into the 1700's.  Our country (then only 13 English colonies) was in the midst of a war with Great Britain.  The Continental Congress was desperately struggling for the right principles to lead a new nation.  55 men signed the Declaration of Independence.  But what was happening behind the scenes?  On the home front, how were the families of these men living?  Were they living in peace, or did they sacrifice much?

The women of yesterday were strong, brave, proud, and ultimately courageous in all that they did.  They too sacrificed their lives, their fortunes, and their sacred honor.  Many had to flee from house to house, always a step ahead of the British.  Many lost their homes, wealth, and livelihood.  Some even lost their lives.

Benjamin Rich, a signer of the Declaration, said this about America's women of that time:  "The women of America have at last become principals in the glorious American controversy.  Their opinions alone and their transcendent influence in society and families must lead us on to success and victory."   You see, the women didn't cower down in fear when they heard the tramp pf British feet or the thundering sound of cannons and musket fire.  They weren't "sissies."  Their lives and the lives of their families were at stake.  If the small 13 colonies had lost the War, the signers would have been hanged or beheaded.  As it was, during the War, their lives were forfeit.  What self-respecting women would wish such a cruel fate upon her husband?  That's why the women had to fight back.  They weren't wimpy crybabies.

Without firing musket, and without marching into battle, the women of colonial America did something even more valuable.  Their purpose was simple yet strong: to uphold the spirits of their men, support them in every action, take care of their families, love, honor, and obey till death did part them, and remain strong and passionate in the cause they were fighting for.  When they had to flee for refuge, when they kissed their husbands goodbye, not to see them for months upon months, when they prayed without ceasing...that took courage.  Yet one thing must remain clear: their courage came from Jesus Christ.

America would have lost the War if not for her faith and prayer.  God was with the little colonies, and eventually made them big and great states.  Everyone understood the power of prayer, which explains why George Washington would kneel down in the cold and snow of Valley Forge to cast his every care upon the Lord.

The women behind the Declaration of Independence are patriots not fully recognized by historians and people today.  If not for the women, the men would have fallen under the weight of all they had to bear.  However, the women readily shared the burden.  They weren't going to resign their posts, for they too longed for peace and freedom.  All they had to do was succeed.

David Barton said this:  "These women, although not pledging their "lives, fortunes, and sacred honor" in writing, nevertheless willingly sacrificed all for their country, their families, and their posterity.  We are that posterity, enjoying all the benefits of their sacrifices."

To recount the lives of each woman would be impossible. (For a summary, read Wives of the Signers, by Harry Clinton Green and Mary Wolcott Green.)  Each woman was important and took drastic steps toward freedom.  For example:

Mary Bartlett: forced to flee with her family from her burning home.

Elizabeth Adams: supported her family with needlework.

Elizabeth Lewis: imprisoned for months by the British, and suffered great hardships that eventually led her to her death.

Mary Morris: driven from her beautiful home.

Annis Stockton: homeless after the British burned her home.

Deborah Hart: driven from home, watched anxiously as her husband was hunted as a criminal, and finally died from exposure and anxiety.

There are countless others.  Take Abigail Adams for example, wife of John Adams, mother of John Quincy Adams, and the first lady of the White House.  She was constantly separated from her husband, yet she remained patriotic and cheerful.  She taught her young children at home, and wrote to her husband frequently.  She was strong in spirit and influential in life.

Every woman from that period deserves high praise for the sacrifices they made.  From their lives we see the pattern we are to follow.  Instead of following the world's model of "womanhood," we can learn better from the past.  Only, we have to realize one intrinsic detail.  It takes courage.

Only A Fool Will Edit His Own Writing

"The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge; but fools despise wisdom and instruction."  ~Proverbs 1:7

A long time ago, some very sound advice was given to my dad from a wise friend and mentor.  That same advice was passed along to me.  I like to think that I take after my daddy in many ways.

Only a fool will edit his own writing.

Even "big-shot" writers need an editor.  As my dad has taught me, everyone makes mistakes; we can't expect anyone to be perfect - even good writers.  We all need a little help.  Especially we who aren't as good as X.

I had to learn that lesson in a not-so-easy way.  Not that I consider myself better than any, I would write and edit my own stuff.  Needless to say, there were times when I could have given my articles a better shot.  Perhaps a little help?  Yeah, that's it.  I'd scribble my thoughts down on paper, type it up on the computer, paste it to my blog, and presto!  Completed.  That's me.  Impulsive.

Eventually, Daddy kindly but firmly told me that things needed to change.  And he was right!  Running my articles past Mom or Dad helps me see my mistakes so I can better them.  Besides, a second opinion is always a nice requirement.  Especially if one wants better success.  Honestly though, I could have responded to his kind rebuke with a prideful attitude and thought I knew better than my own papa. (Heaven forbid!)  Or I could have burst into tears and given up writing altogether, especially since I'm not perfect and can't do anything right!  (That's a laugh.  No one is and no one can.)  Emotional dramatic extreme is just too common for girls.  We can flood the house with tears over the silliest things.

Isn't life pretty precarious at times?  One minute we're dancing among the clouds...

...The next we feel lower than a worm.  I guess that's the way human beings were created.  Living in an imperfect world, in a flawed body, with a sinful heart, we must expect some things to seem like...unfair.  Others seem more blessed than we.  Others have different skills and gifts.  I can look around and find things that I'm at a disadvantage with compared to other people.  I can wish and cry and complain all I want, but I'm unique in my own way.  On the plain and unfashionable side maybe, but I can still live passionately for what I believe is right.

One thing in which we all measure up to is foolishness.  Remember the time you blurted out something incomprehensible and everybody just stared?  Or maybe when you tripped down a flight of stairs, walked into a wall, or stood awkwardly in the middle of a room and felt utterly lost, confused, and foolish?  We all do silly things, and we all feel uneasy at some point or another.  I myself used to be terribly shy.  I haven't conquered that obstacle completely, but I used to be much worse.  I would not initiate any conversation unless I was specifically engaged.  Even then I was short and to the point.  Some people may call that dull.  Yet no one knew the inner longing of wanting to be like so-and-so who was outgoing and a great conversationalist.  But I've always been that way.  Honestly, I've wished so many times that I could hold all of my conversations on paper.  Maybe that's unusual?  My pen has always been stronger than my tongue.

I'm not one who (literally) voices my opinions forcefully.  Although, if you were given a glimpse into my brain, the force of the thoughts might drive you hundreds of miles away.  I need drawn out somehow.  But just because I bottle everything up inside of me doesn't mean it’s the way I should be.  Too many times I want to say something and don't.  Life comes at each of us in different angles sometimes.

Rebuke can be given in many ways.  But no matter the tone of voice or display of feeling, we should always be as the wise son that Proverbs talks about, who "heareth his father's instruction."  (Proverbs 13:1)  "A scorner heareth not rebuke."

As human beings, we all want to "show-off" our goodness.  For "the way of a fool is right in his own eyes: but he that harkeneth unto counsel is wise." ~Proverbs 12:15.  Wouldn't life be fuller in every sense if we behaved in a wise manner?  Instead we are usually prone to foolishness.  Will we be as the wise man who built his house upon a rock; and the rains descended and the floods came, yet he remained fast and secure; or as the foolish man who built his house upon the sand, and was left homeless, destitute, and helpless after the rain and floods washed his house away into the sea?  Which choice will it be?

Remember, only a fool will edit his own writing.  Are we foolish enough to edit the pages of our lives, or are we wise enough to leave that to God?  Only He holds the future.